13. Carer: Carer for several members of family with various conditions
I care for/support several members of my family; an elderly aunt, my mum who is 79 and has Lymph Cancer, Peripheral Vascular Disease and Epilepsy amongst other conditions. My father who is 84 and suffers from Emphysema and has been in hospital five times this year, so far, and a elderly aunt needs my support intermittently. I also share care with my cousin for another aunt who has Alzheimer's disease. She stays in North Lanarkshire.
I've lived in England for the last 33 years and decided to move back to South Lanarkshire eighteen months ago before the five hour drive every time one of my family was ill became too much. My family all have care packages in place. I feel it is my role to ensure they receive the right care package. The other things I do for them, if needed, are shopping, washing, ironing, escorting them to hospital, dentist, bank appointments as well as providing any advice they ask for. I am also Power of Attorney for all four of them. For me, it is all about planning, organisation and prioritising within the people I care for. When I lived in England I worked part time as a Human Resource Consultant and part time as a Complementary Health Therapist. I have managed to fit my caring role around my HR Consultancy but have been unable to continue with my complementary health therapy. By planning in advance I manage to meet up with friends and still have some social life.
As far as my health is concerned, my previously good diet and eating habits have suffered and I now find myself eating the wrong foods at the wrong times and sometimes feel very low. What do I get out of it?
Knowing what I am doing is giving my family a better quality of life and removing worries that they would otherwise have. It would help if some of the processes were not so time consuming. It would also help if there was a better understanding from health professionals. For example; when applying for renewal of my aunt's blue badge who, as well as having Alzheimer's, has had two hip replacements and suffers from oedema, making it difficult for her to walk, the doctor didn't get in touch with me when looking over the forms I had completed.
He called my aunt, with Alzheimer's and she told him there was nothing wrong with her. The application was therefore declined. Despite writing a letter to the GP asking him to re-consider, the application was still declined. At that time I didn't have the energy to fight it so I left it for six months, made an appointment with another GP and went through the whole process again. This time he wholeheartedly supported the application
As a carer I was unconsciously incompetent and didn't know what I needed to know. With advice from a friend, I looked on the internet for carer information and found South Lanarkshire Carers Network. I called the office to find out about the monthly carers' meeting and now attend regularly. I have learned a lot from speaking to other carers and especially from the speakers. The network has been a Godsend to me. It gives me peace of mind to know where I can get the information I need.